Fuck love.
It’s the fakest thing out there.

When do the tears stop?

I am too good of a person to feel so damn sad. My smile brightens up peoples days, - and yet I have given up looking for it. It’s so far gone now and I feel empty in every possible way.

I’ve never felt colder
than I do right now.

From the thought that every
I love you, -
every tightened hug, -
every kiss on the forehead, -
every loving glance shared, -
was just a ploy.

After all, -
you love everyone.

I am no more special
than the last girl
you had
over, -
than the next
girl you have over, -
than the next after her.

They are all likely far
better than me in, -
in every way.

This might be it.
The moment that you finally
win. The moment that my
heart forever
loses faith in love.

Lost, -
when forever and always
suddenly means once and
sometimes.

I am so cold.

Well. I could eat but I think I’d rather just starve and hopefully shrivel away to nothing.

I.
I am hurting.

There is not much else
for me to say.

But I will try to.

II.
I do not want to bring this up but, -

I would take it
back if I
could.

I’ve even forgotten of it, -
why can’t you?

III.
I do not want to bring this up again but, -

I deserve to be forgiven.

I deserve for it to be
recognized that I have
nothing to even
apologize for.

You chose to take that
break and to stop being officially
mine and I officially
yours. I refused and I
pleaded with more desperation than words can accurately
describe, - for you. -
You were the one who ignored
me while I cried.

In fact, - you seemed that you could care
less. I cried and I cried at night and in
broad daylight and, -
and you seemed that you could care
less.

Do you understand me when I say that I
only ever wish for your touch?
Even then I only wished for your touch.
Hurt drove me mad and who can
blame me for thinking that if I
tried what you do, -
that if I tried what you were doing, -

That maybe I could begin to
feel as little as you do, - too.

IV.
My heart beats within you.

People talk of moving on and
getting over people, -

but I do not believe that these
people have loved as much as I have loved, -
as much as I love you.
They couldn’t have, -
because I will, -
I will never get over you.

V.
What hurt the most today, -
was that you used to drive
four hours just to come and
see me for a couple of
days.

Today, -
today you drove one and a
half hours, - just to get
rid of me.

The tears now running down my
face prove just how much that
hurts me.

VI.
We are perfect for one another.

Why can you not
see that?

I love every
single
inch of you.

And yet you second
guess yourself in the
morning. I see it and it, -
it hurts when we are always so
wonderful in the evening.

I adore looking at you with love.
Please.
Please stop pushing me
away and let me just, -
let me never again hold someone
new.

Please let it just be you.

I wanted to tell you how you are beginning to be the one I can talk to. I don’t write this to you, because it is not time. I may never tell you, and in years, I may not need to, because you might become part of my life—-physically and mentally… and there would be no need to verbalize because you would understand.
Sylvia Plath (via seabois)
That’s the problem with putting others first; you’ve taught them you come second.

read that, again. 

things I need to beat into my brain

(via nicotinas)

(Source: angiellehcim)

In fact, my soul and yours are the same. You appear in me, I appear in you. We hide in each other.
Rumi (via seabois)
  • me: i don't even care. i'm not going to talk about this anymore.
  • ...
  • me: and you know what else? [2000 word rant]
Please don’t be in love with someone else.
When I say I miss being home, I don’t mean it in the literal sense.
These walls do not make me feel safe.
You did.

Jeigo, Still Homesick (via jeigo)

lockbottom:

cuidesac:

I would kill to be your clothes, cling to your body and hang from your bones

Holy shit I love this